33 weeks (last week)

This is actually my pic from last week. I didnt ever post it. I take pics every two weeks, so the next one may not even fit on this page. lol I feel like I have really popped out this week. Im hoping that Owen is the one getting all of the food I have been eating. I swear I am channeling my Gramma who eats, then has a snack, then eats, then has a snack, then eats, then has a snack, cuz thats been how my 34th week has gone. I might get in trouble at my next doctors appt. But then again, at our ultrasound, he was a pound underweight according to the tech, so maybe it will all even out. Yeah....lets go with that!! :) Im still continuing to be positive and hopeful and praying everyday. Theres only 40 days left!! HOLY CRAP!!! Keep those prayers coming our way!! :)

xoxo,
S

PS- Look!! I do have a head!! lmao

Reflecting

I have had something rattling around in my head for a while now. I have come to understand part of it, I think. I dont see myself ever understanding the whole thing, but I think that is the point. I am able to take something new away from this experience and I think that is enough to be happy with.
These past few months have been the hardest and most emotionally conflicting months I have ever had to endure. I like for things to make sense, I like to find the answer to things, I am an anal person, I like control, I like organization and I like being able to have a plan in my head for what I want to get accomplished and then get it done. I havent been able to do that so this has been a new experience for me, but one that just because of what it is, has helped me to appreciate it more. It has been a matter of relishing each moment instead of checking things off of a checklist.
When I think about how unexpected this was and how I most likely would be handling it if things hadnt gone the way they had a few months ago, I am certain I would be taking it for granted and be naggy and whiney and annoying. Instead, though, I feel I am really focusing on the positive and enjoying every aspect.
Thats not to say that this still isnt the most difficult thing, but I have just learned to appreciate it because of how difficult it is, in some strange way that I cant fully understand or explain. And even though we still dont know what the outcome will be, I am grateful for the learning and growth that I have been able to experience because of it. I am grateful that my faith has been strengthened throughout this journey.
I dont know if this is the path I was supposed to end up on or if I am way off base, but this is what I have been able to accept in my head. I still have alot more that I dont really understand the reason behind, but at this point in time, thats ok. I dont have to understand everything, I just have to be able to look at myself and know that I was the best person I could be in the hardest time.

xoxo
S

PS. BLTRAK

Summer!!! :)

Lets get caught up, shall we?? :)
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School is out, both for me and for my kids as well. Now the lazy days of summer begin!! Yay!!
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We have been to the Dunes already this summer. Max had been insisting that we go for weeks before school was even out, and so, on his birthday, he got his wish!! It was HOT and a great day for the dunes!! The water was freezing though!!! The kids didnt seem to mind and we all had a great day!! :)
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The RBF is next week and I will be walking in it with my girlies from work and our kids from this past school year!! Im hoping for no humidity that day!! :) Us teachers are wearing shirts that have our personal silly motto on them, "What happens in preschool, stays in preschool!" I decorated mine and Kim's. The kids all got to use Sharpies and decorate their shirts however they wanted. They turned out so cute!! :)
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In baby news, I am 31 weeks today and I am going to see my doctor every two weeks now. I was told two weeks ago that I could only gain two pounds the next time she saw me. This is because I had managed to gain a whopping TWELVE pounds in one month!! Ahh!! It was all that eating at school, holy crap!!! Thankfully school is out now and at my last appointment this past Wednesday, I had actually lost two pounds, so she was pleased. Woohoo!! My iron and sugar tests came back good too. Yay!! She is concerned that lil Owen is breech still and wants me to tell him to turn otherwise its not going to be a very fun delivery day. She will most likely schedule one last ultrasound just to check his size and position. We did talk about delivery day as well because it is my biggest anxiety. She assured me that she would assemble a team who would be caring and supportive and not treat my baby according to the label the amnio gave him. That made me feel better!! Although Owen is doing well and his spine, brain, heart and all of his organs are normal, and his weight and size are good, he is moving constantly (I read that his senses are now all formed and I have noticed that he startles now at loud noises, which is a good sign!!) and hiccuping, we still have that label in the back of our minds and following us wherever we go. I ask that you all please continue your prayers for us as we enter the final stretch. There are less than 10 weeks to go!!! If you could throw in a prayer that the stubborn lil worm un-breeches himself, that would sure help me out alot!! Thanks for all of your prayers, love, and support!!
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I guess I will wrap this up. I hope everyone enjoys their summer!! We have a very busy one ahead of us!! I have family and friends coming home and BBQs and Rusty is doing another wedding, and shew, its exhausting to just think about!!
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Take care of you!! :)
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xoxo,
S