Sunday, January 2, 2011

Im Either Nuts or Im Normal...

PREFACE: When I had this blog in my head, I didnt have a picture in my head to go with it. I had to write the blog first and then I went in search of a picture to go with it. My first thought was to type in "hold on" in the search box. I found this picture and its perfect. Just thought Id share...

Ok, so my last blog talked about how excited I was for 2010 to go and 2011 to begin. Well, thats still half true.
I discovered as I was watching the ball drop with my husband and kids that a ball was welling in my throat. I was going to cry. I had to suck it up before anybody noticed. It visited me again once everyone was in bed asleep and its been making an appearance every now and then since New Years Eve.
It sounds strange, but as much as I was wanting all of the sadness of 2010 to be gone, I realized that the sadness also held people I love within it. By wanting the sadness to be gone, I was also wanting the people I loved to be gone too, right? Well maybe not, but at the current moment, thats how I feel. I know that no matter if the year changes over, that Owen will not be gone from my heart or my memory. I know that all of my lost loved ones will still be a part of me for as long as I live. I dont know why I am linking the sad events and the people they involved with the year of the events happening? I guess more time and more thinking will straighten it all out.
Or maybe not. lol Im getting used to unanswered questions being a part of my life.
Ill just continue to live and laugh and love and be happy and grateful for what I have. Thats all I can do!! :)
Two blogs in two days......dont get used to that!! ;)